Cheer Up! Somebody is looking after you.

THE LIVING DEAD

When we talk about the living dead we usually refer to zombies or people who have died but have somehow managed to rise from the dead and roam among the living.  While they are literally dead they roam with a specific goal in mind, mostly to search for fresh human flesh to consume, as depicted in most fictional stories.  My question now is, what do you call the living who are more dead than the dead.  Does that make sense to you?  They are those who are stuck in a routine, they eat the same food, they don't want to try anything new, they are apprehensive to leave the comforts of their home, they lack goals, and probably most revealing of all is the fact that they're afraid to die and try to do everything in their powers to stay alive despite living a life that most would consider dead.  Have you encountered people like this in your life?

THE UNCLE WHO LOVED LECHON

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Roots of Friendship

OLD FRIENDSHIPS

A high school friend once labeled our reunion pictures as "old friends from our younger years."  I didn't like the sound of that.  What got stuck in my mind was the word "old" and I don't in any way  feel old at all.  (Okay, maybe sometimes I do - when my joints start aching after a grueling session of badminton.)  So when I was faced with the same challenge of defining old friendships, I had to try and come up with a better-sounding word.  I thought, why not something like "deeply-rooted friendships."         

MAGIC NUMBER 7

When we study Marketing management, our professors would remind us of how the human mind can only remember seven (7) items at one time.  This means that brands will have to outshine each other and compete for limited space in our short-term memories, hence the importance of marketing.  

This discussion actually goes beyond brand recognition.  It is also true that people are only capable of maintaining a limited number of relationships.  I'm not an expert but I'd say it would be around 7 as well.  Thanks to technology however, that number has greatly increased and people can now accommodate probably even seven hundreds.    

DEVELOPING ROOTS

With the advent of social media sites like Facebook, one can now be friends literally with hundreds of people and stay connected and updated with each other with just one click.  Some of these however, are people you've only met once or even people whom you've just gotten to know through the internet.  The roots are fairly superficial and are only a few inches below ground.  They are not well anchored and they can be easily yanked out.  And that is why we have to water and nourish these roots so that they can grow bigger and burrow deeper into the ground.

One way to do that in Facebook is to visit your friends' walls every now and then and leaving comments on their pictures and statuses.  If you don't have anything to say, you can simply 'like' them.  

If you wanna go deeper, why not send a personal message asking how they're doing or if you're a fan of chat, go ahead and chat.  Forgive me if I don't do this, I'm not a fan of chat.  It's too wasteful in my opinion.

But nothing beats creating stronger roots by actually meeting in person and doing things together.  That is why I allocate time for people I want to reconnect or connect with.  

And so it was surprising to hear someone say that he no longer cares for coffee sessions because he couldn't take meeting old friends and talking about past experiences again.  I guess he never realized that what they were actually doing, despite bringing up past experiences, was creating new connections and nourishing old roots. 

Another important thing is not to construe people who are active in the social media scene as people who are needy of attention or people who don't have lives of their own.  Humans by nature are SOCIAL beings.  That's another thing I learned from my MBA degree.  It is but NATURAL for people to be involved in social events.

"HELLO"

No matter how deep you've nourished these roots, it is a fact of life and friendship however, that these can be disintegrated with even just a single action or word.  People will then stop reconnecting and watering their roots.  As a consequence, the roots decay and die.  

Don't torture your friend and yourself! ... RECONNECT!   

If you want to reconnect, start by saying "HELLO."  It's that simple.  No matter what happened in the past, you'd be surprised how many people are more than willing to stop you right there and then and just say  .... "You had me at Hello."  

(Breaking out into a Hello song will be too much already. hahaha (^o^)v) 

Develop your roots and establish deeply-rooted friendships.  Not only will your foundation become strong but you'll also be surprised how much taller and more beautiful you'll grow above ground.

Cheers to Friendships!

Photo Credits: Water color art in Tissue paper by Chris Magnus!

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Let's play a game of WHATs

Let's play a game of Whats.  It's very simple.  I've prepared three questions, all inspired by the book Eat Pray Love, beginning with the question word 'What'.  It starts with the very simple question "What's your favorite gelato flavor?".  The next 2 however won't be that easy.  I'll share my views and I hope to hear from you as well.  Let me just warn you in advance that this post has the potential of becoming as long as my previous post After Omphaloskepsis. Life's a Charm, you have been forewarned. (^o^)v  I promise to keep it short and simple though in the spirit of the Italian expression "Parla Come Mangi".

Let's Play! (Continue Reading to play)

What's your favorite Gelato flavor?

I love Gelato!  It's one of my favorite desserts.  Elizabeth Gilbert, author of the book Eat Pray Love, must have loved it too - when she was in Rome she ate Gelato all day long!  My favorite flavors are Pistaccio, Chocolate Mint, and Chili Chocolate!      

Personally, I find the Pistaccio flavored gelatos being offered by gelato shops here in the Philippines not come up to par with the one I tasted back in Rome (2006).  I don't know if it's because of the quality of the ingredients, the originality, or simply because it was the first gelato I tasted.  Regardless, every time Pistaccio is available, I am almost certain I would order it.

Chocolate Mint, on the other hand, is good anywhere in the world (Rome, Australia, Philippines)!  If you want something that would never fail to satisfy your taste buds, order this.  Chocolate and mint just goes very well.  

And if you haven't tried it yet, chocolate also goes very well with chili! (Just don't overdo the chili and make sure the spiciness is well blended into the mixture. Put a dash in your next cup of hot choco, you'll love it.)  And when I was in Greenbelt 5 (Manila) last month, I found Chili Chocolate as one of Gelatissimo's offering.  I wasn't disappointed.  I have yet to find any other gelato shop that carry this flavor.  I'm not sure though if it's a regular offering.  Surprisingly, there's more Gelatissimo outlets in Cebu!  Two to be exact.  One in SM City Cebu and one in Ayala Center.  And not so surprisingly, there's none in Davao.  If you're in Davao, the next best thing would probably be to go to Crepelato in Mayon St.

What do you think?

It was a friend who brought up this topic a few years back and I didn't believe it at all back then.  I was (so naive and was) for bringing a child into this world to allow it to experience LIFE. (Understandably, that was when my life seemed perfect - not too far back) However, as the years progressed, I'm starting to believe it more myself.  Do parents bear children more for selfish reasons - meaning for their own sake - rather than anything else? What do you think?

Elizabeth Gilbert wrote "I think people have children for all manners of reasons - sometimes out of a pure desire to nurture and witness life, sometimes out of an absence of choice, sometimes in order to hold on to a partner or create an heir, sometimes without thinking about it in any particular way.  Not all the reasons to have children are the same, and not all of them are necessarily unselfish.  Not all the reasons not to have children are the same, either, though."

Richard Fish, lawyer played by actor Greg Germann in famous TV series Ally McBeal, had this to say - "Having a child is a selfish thing.  Couples don't walk around wanting to give life.  They say 'we want a child, .. we want, we want."  It's a selfish thing.  Not that it's a good selfish but it's selfish."

What's your WORD?

And finally, we come to the last 'what' question 'What's your word?'.  One of the Italians that Liz met in her travels suggested something like every city and every person having a word.  A city's word is what majority of the people living in that city are thinking about and it supposedly defines that city.  While a person's word is what defines that person - how that person thinks.  And the catch is, for someone to belong - to feel at home - in a particular city, that person has to have the same word as the city.  

Rome's word is supposedly "SEX", the Vatican's is "POWER", Naples' is "FIGHT", New York's is "ACHIEVE", Los Angeles's is "SUCCEED", and Stockholm's is "CONFORM." 

When I was studying in UP Diliman (Quezon City), I would say the word that time inside the campus was "EXCEL."  Although I stayed in Makati City just recently for a month, I still don't have a clue as to what the city's word really is.  It must be because most people actually just go there to work, to shop, or to enjoy.  People from different cities therefore come and go, bringing with them different words in the process .... perhaps "BUSINESS?" / "WORK?" / "VARIETY?" / "LUXURY?" - Let me think about it more.  

In my 3 years in Cebu I would say the word is "IDENTITY."  Cebuanos are a mix culture of different identities from the affluent mestizos to the not-so-underground bisdak society.  What I love about them is their strong sense of identity and their pride as Cebuanos.  And being not afraid to express all that.  

In my 4 years in Sapporo City, or in Japan generally, I would say the word is "CAREFUL" or "RESPECT."  Everybody there seemed to walk while thinking all along not to bump anyone, not to step on anyone's toes, or even simply not to talk or approach anyone you don't know.  Voices even have to be kept at a low volume so as not to disturb anybody who might be nearby.  Would you believe it when I say that one of my Jap colleague refused to recline his airline seat simply because somebody was seated behind him? And did you notice how they can expertly fold their newspaper so as it doesn't invade the space of the passenger seated next to them?  Unbelievable.  The only exceptions to this are probably the Yakuza-like individuals.  

If you ask me, I think Davao's word is "OBEY." (or maybe "ORDERLY")  Most, if not all, Dabawenyos are law-abiding.  Alcohol curfew is strictly followed at 2am.  It is not even uncommon, although becoming rare, to find a jeepney driver who's willing to give way in traffic.  And the epitome of it all is the Kadayawan festival.  Just watch the parade tomorrow and you'll see what I mean.  Street dancing participants are widely spaced out while onlookers are cordoned off way to the side.  It just doesn't have the same feel as the Sinulog festival of Cebu.  It's as if the city is not celebrating a festival at all.  But I do love Davao.

          

Now, I'm conflicted.  I still have yet to find my word but it certainly isn't "OBEY."

And Oh! Happy Kadayawan! And I know I should just have written 3 different posts! hehehe         

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Identity Crisis @ 31

I've always had issues with my name.  I don't like it that much.  For one, there is the bewildered expression I get from friends when they come to know that I have a different surname than the rest of my family.  It always makes an interesting conversation piece.  A topic that can be personal, which can be good for opening up, without being too personal for me.  However, interesting as it may be, sometimes it just doesn't amuse me.    

And then there's my first name which has been interpreted more than a couple of times.  People in my hometown of Davao City know me as Stephen (stef-en) but I grew up with a nickname of "Pen".  When I moved to Manila to attend university, my name became Stephen (stee-fuhn).  And people began calling me Steph (steef), which was perfectly fine for me as this was the most acceptable pronunciation of my name in the whole Philippines.  Or so I thought, because when I moved to Cebu people found it weird to call me Steph (steef), as for them, this nick is mostly used for girls with a name of Stephanie.  And so variations like "Tep" and "Tebs" arised.  Tep from sTEPhen and Tebs as short for Esteban, which I guess is the Tagalog version of my name. (Worst of all some would call me Phen ("Fen!"), I can't think of anybody who would want to be called that?!)

And the variations didn't stop there.  In Japan people referred to me as su-te-fan which is pronounce as Stefan, the same as that of the great Swedish tennis player Stefan Edberg.  I tried to correct them but it was futile.  Any other pronunciation would require additional syllables which would be awkward to pronounce in Japanese.  And so I settled for this, as this was the most natural for the Japanese and I didn't mind being called the same way as Edberg, a tennis legend in his own right.  And lastly, western friends would refer to me as Steven (stee-vuhn), and would shorten it to Steve, which is the American way and probably the international pronunciation of my name.  

No doubt, all these names have caused their share of confusion.  A college friend once called me up in my uncle's house in Manila and my cousin, who also hails from Davao, answered the phone.  "Hello," my friend asked, "may I talk with stee-fuhn. please." "Ha?," goes my cousin and after a brief pause came to realize that it was for me and says, "Ahh ... si stef-en."  

These all adds to the mystery that is me but what I can't stop pondering is whether if I could have confused myself in the process as well? No doubt, this identity crisis has gotten into me as well.  Tsk tsk tsk.

One good thing I can think of that can be derived from this whole experience is the fact that it would be easy to recognize where and what time in my life I met someone by the way they would call me.  But I guess this is looking at the glass way half-full right?  Or as we engineers would see it, the glass is 50% full!

And so I am planning to internationalize my name soon.  I think the best way to go, especially if my plans push through, would be to use Stephen (stee-vuhn).  What do you think?        

And oh yeah, before I forget, did I mention that I went through 3 different Chinese names as well? This makes me wanna say Vaffanculo! (Just a little Italian a learned today (^o^)v)

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After Omphaloskepsis

Do not believe everything that you read.

1

That's another thing I got from Anonymous Lawyer.  Do not believe everything that you read!  Especially those written by bloggers. hehehe (^o^)/  I finally finished the book and was devastated with the ending. *sigh*  For the first time I actually felt sympathetic for the jerk and didn't root for the underdogs.  

I realized that this may have something to do with me feeling that I have been the underdog all my life.  Although I feel it, most people around me probably don't perceive me as such.  I guess I'm really not one then if the people's perception don't reflect it.  It's about time to start feeling like a champion and being one, I guess.

2

I discovered something last week.  When I dream of paradise, I dream of myself lounging by the sea surrounded by fine white sand and clear blue skies, smelling the cool crisp air, listening to the rhythmic splashes of the waves, and drinking an ice cold buko juice (coconut juice) complete with a tiny umbrella.  I noticed that I had the beach all to myself.  There were no people swimming on the beach, no children making sand castles by the shore, not even extra lounge chairs by my side.  There was only one chair and I was on it.  

If ever you've seen yourself the same way, you're probably the only company you'll ever need.  The world will never be to your liking and people will continue to disappoint you because they will never be you.  Imagine your vision of paradise.  Maybe you'll learn something from it.

3

There were some quotes from Agassi's book that I forgot to write about.  One was when he wrote "I play and keep playing because I choose to play.  Even if it's not your ideal life, you can always choose it.  No matter what your life is, choosing it changes everything." Because believe it or not, Agassi hated tennis and yet he excelled playing tennis and became one of the greatest champions of all time.

And Anonymous Lawyer had this to say about the Musician who has decided to pursue music instead of practicing law after graduation, "For some reason, no one ever wonders "what if" they don't pursue a career at a big law firm ... It's not brave to pursue impossible dreams.  It's brave to put those dreams aside and suck it up and choose a real job instead.  It's brave to fight through the imaginary "crisis of the soul" and realize that most people don't love their jobs but they do them anyway."

For that matter, I don't believe someone ever wondered "what if I pursued a career in software programming?" as well.  Nevertheless, just choose to love whatever you're doing and although you might not become as great as Agassi you might still get that applause from your peers.

"I tell the players: You'll hear a lot of applause in your life, fellas, but none will mean more to you than that applause from your peers.  I hope each of you hears that at the end." - Andre Agassi -

Do everything well and do it the best you can and people, even your competition, will respect you for it.  Surround yourself with people that will appreciate your skill and whatever else there is that you have to give.

4

And yes, this blog hasn't always been truthful.  In a way, I use this blog to project a world  (my world) where the glass is always half full.  Writing it really makes a difference.  It makes you internalize it more than when you've just thought about it.  I guess the sentence "Convince yourself" would apply here.  It will help you keep your sanity but only for a while.  Sooner or later the bubble will burst.  (And when it does, just start writing again. hehehe (^o^)/)

5

If you're wondering about the title, check this article called "If you gain wisdom from staring at your belly button it's omphaloskepsis ..."  Simply put it's like meditating while thinking or probably looking at your navel area.  There's some interesting trivia about our belly button in the article.  If you're interested, or have nothing better to do, check it out. (^o^)v

Again, do not believe everything that you read. 

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Anonymous Programmer

I'm reading through the first few weeks (which is how the author referred to chapters in the book) of Anonymous Lawyer, a novel by Jeremy Blachman about a hiring partner at one of the world's largest law firms.  There's a reason behind why he used "weeks" instead of "chapters." That's because the novel was adopted from his blog of the same title. If you click this link, it will take you to the Anonymous Lawyer blog site which remains to be one of the most popular blog sites in the web today.  It even now has a spin off site called the Anonymous Law Firm.  For all those seeking opportunities how to make money online or simply if you want to be famous, this is certainly another possibility!       

I simply can't get enough of the book.  I find it hilarious!  It's fun and interesting to read the thoughts of a lawyer who's a jerk most of the time but can be sensible at times as well.  I know that the book is a work of fiction but the caption at the back saying "He lives a lie but posts the truth" seems to sum it all up.  The character may be fictional but the ideas presented seem to reflect what the author, who happens to be a lawyer himself, believes is needed to become a partner in a big law firm albeit being over exaggerated at times.  The book is highly recommended! Special mention goes to aspiring lawyers who want to know if they have what it takes to be a partner according to Anonymous Lawyer's standards.

An anecdote about billable hours reminded me of my time as a software engineer in Anonymous Company.  In an effort to improve processes and measure the actual time spent on programming in a certain project, Anonymous Company required everyone to log the hours worked on every project at the end of the day.  The catch is, everyone was expected to allocate the total working hours spent in a day into specific projects.  I couldn't help but be skeptical because I couldn't find projects labeled as "Bathroom time", "Snack time", and "Sleep / Rest time" on the charts!  Not that any decent programmer would actually input times spent for these, but it just shows how some processes will not work for every system.  Not to mention that for most projects, more than 50 percent of the time allotted for development are actually spent idle.  Just like Anonymous Lawyer  who charged his clients around 600 dollars for his bathroom time, I can't help but think that we may have done the same!  Although I doubt that the time would come when software programmers can charge 600 dollars per hour! (^o^)/  Imagining the days when I just sat the whole day staring at my computer, waiting for updates and fixes, and yet willfully inputting 8 hours for a certain project makes me feel a little guilt within me.  Although it is abruptly followed by a feeling of entitlement considering that staring at the computer and doing nothing at all for the whole day is actually more difficult than doing actual programming (^o-)v.

On a last note, I'd like to share what Anonymous Lawyer had to say about his nephew who's a sophomore in college and is taking up painting.  He wrote "He thinks making money is wrong unless you do something good with it. He said I'm selfish. ... I think he has a lot of growing up to do. ...  He wants to paint.  Not everyone who wants to paint can make a living painting.  He doesn't understand that the world doesn't always let you do what you want to do.  There are sacrifices and trade offs.  You can't always follow your heart. ... Too many kids are stupid these days.  They have too many options.  Too many choices.  They think they can have ridiculous dreams and make them come true. ... I understand going for it if you don't have anything else you can do.  But if you're smart enough to get a real job, and make some real money, you're just being an idiot not to secure your future."  

I don't know about his nephew, but it surely knocked some sense into me. (^o-)v.

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My Home Garden

When I stayed in Japan, I realized that I love being outdoors, enjoying nature and enjoying the sun. I miss going driving by the mountains during autumn and enjoying the picnics with friends at parks. The hanami picnics will have to be the best. That's the time when Japan's national flower, the sakura, blossoms for just a couple of weeks at the start of spring.

If I were to build my dream house, it would definitely have a majestic garden. It's an extra expense I know, but nothing really beats waking up to the serene view it offers and walking around it to enjoy the cool and fresh air. My garden would be Zen inspired. It will have Japanese looking tress, maybe even bonsai trees, a small wooden bridge (or a pathway made out of wooden planks will do), and maybe a meditation garden as well, just like the one shown in the picture above. (The picture by the way, is that of Ryouanji, the meditation rock garden in Kyoto.)

I'm also planning to build garden buildings in the middle of my Zen garden. The buildings' walls will be made out of glass so that one can enjoy the view of the garden from the inside. The place would be great for lazing around during weekends, reading books, enjoying dinner with family, or maybe even for throwing parties with family and friends. I'm thinking the experience would be exhilarating. It would be like enjoying dinner in an exclusive restaurant reserved for the night just for you and your family and friends. And best of all, nobody has to eat hurriedly and everyone can enjoy a nice conversation over sake, beer, wine, or water, whichever you prefer.

I remember one of my uncles saying that somehow food tastes better when being enjoyed outdoors, just like when you are at the beach with friends eating grilled food with your bare hands.

It so happens that here in Davao, we live in a subdivision that's not overcrowded and the air is still fresh because of all the trees surrounding us. It is very near downtown Davao but the place is still very peaceful and quiet. It looks like my dream house and garden is not that far from becoming a reality after all.

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Before and After: My Bedroom

The bedroom is my sanctuary. I spend most of my time in my bedroom. I like to keep it clean and clutter free but I'm just really messy. I have a tendency to keep things which I just end up throwing in the long run (junk, for short). I remember bringing a whole box of junk from Japan after my 1st year of training. My sister and mom can testify to this. I know cause I think they were a bit disappointed to see that the big box only contained my books and a lot of junk. No pasalubong (gifts) for them in there. hehehe (^o^)/

The pictures above are the BEFORE pictures of my room. Those were taken around August of 2007, a month after my return. The pictures below are the AFTER pictures taken today. How do you like it?

After one year, I'm getting bored with the layout already. But the space is quite small and I really can't move things around freely because of the size and the placement of the electrical sockets. I like remodeling my room. Somehow the new layout and atmosphere also renews my spirit. It's a great stress reliever. I'm planning to buy a sturdier metal rack soon. I hope inspiration will come so I can remodel my room again. In the mean time, I found this site with great bathroom remodeling ideas. Makes me wanna change some features in my bathroom as well. (^o^)/

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Taking a Step Back (Yaya Diaries Part 2)

And so you know that we don't have maids around the house right now. My mom seems to be feeling guilty and she tries do everything on her own. But knowing her, I know she doesn't do it because of guilt but because she knows she can and she wants to.

In an ordinary family, it would be more natural, i guess, for parents in their 60's to lay back and let the younger generation do the work. You would think that is just so, yes. Especially if that younger generation is doing mostly nothing during the day except surf the internet and blog. Yes, that is me. (^O-)v I bet I'm officially what the Japanese would refer to as a kane-kui-mushi or money-eating parasite in English, that is. However, my parents are not like that. They still treat me as their guest (a subtler word for King) in our own house. And although I've always wanted to help, I've learned to take a step back for now.

I'm just so impressed with my parents on how they can still manage to prepare breaksfast (with fresh juice freshly made everyday), to do the laundry, to clean the house, and then to open our store by 7am in the morning. They really are super parents and if anyone's wondering how we managed to acquire a considerable amount of wealth over the years, you have your answer right here.

I've managed to cook the family meals from time to time but no official house responsibility has been designated upon me. Except maybe to choose the restaurant we go to eat and be the driver on Sundays.

In my desire to help more, for 2 days now, since I've been awake earlier than usual, I've secretly grabbed the broom and swept the whole house. Yes, I swept and not vacuumed it. We don't have a vacuum cleaner in the house. And of course, I clean after my own which is doing the dishes after eating the breakfast they've prepared for me.

I'd really like to help more but sometimes help is not wanted. At least that is how I feel.

Could it be the fact that being in their 60's my parents are now trying to prove that they still have it and can still do anything tasked upon them?

I really don't know. In the mean time, I let them be. I am taking a step back until they say that they can't take it no longer. And that will have to do even when it comes to manning our store.

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Yaya Diaries

Daphne Oseña is having problems with her maids lately. She says she has too many of them. Meanwhile, at home, we just lost both of ours. If she's reading my blog, I'd like to ask her to send one to us.(^^;)

Last Sunday (Sept. 14) when I woke up, my mom greets me with saying that our two maids are gone. She has kicked them out of the house and that was only at 9am in the morning.

Decent ("matino") housekeepers are hard to find these days. If you think Manila is a city, for people living in the far flung areas of Mindanao like Surigao, Davao is their city. Most of them would venture into the city, apply to be a housekeeper, just so they can find someone to marry. Yes, that is their main aim to come to the city. It is not to earn money because the moment they marry they leave whatever work they have. It seems like all the males in their own cities have migrated to the big cities like Davao, so they have to follow suit as well. And so when 5pm nears and house constructions in adjacent streets stop, expect them to eagerly come out of the houses with a new found spirit to suddenly clean the garden, water the plants, take out the trash, or whatever activities there are outside the house. And on Sundays, although we allow them to take the day off, my mom expects them to at least sweep the floor and clean the rooms first. Considering that this is the only day they can do this as the house is normally locked the moment my parents leave for work early in the mornings, the rest of the week. And this has been their routine for as long as I remember. Well, until last Sunday that is.

Last Sunday, while still early in the morning my mom hears them taking a bath and preparing to leave the house already. And upon checking on them, she finds out that their bathroom has not been kept tidy at all. When she reprimanded them, one even had the guts to answer back and tell her that they were leaving by the end of month anyway. Well, if you know my mom, that's more than enough to burst anything their is to burst inside of her, so she sent them packing that instant.

And later she contemplates that it was wrong for her to hire siblings as they tend to be too close to each other, play all the time, and neglect their duties. However, if you get another pair that doesn't get along at all, then you're bound to lose one in a few months.

Maids ... maids ... maids ...

I think Daphne says it best, "I can't live with them but I can't live without them."

-o-

By the way, I've added a star rating tool at the bottom of every post. If you are in a hurry and can't leave a comment, maybe you can at least click the stars to give your rating of that particular post. Thanks!

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Stand up Now, Be a Hero

I am a Hero

I do what I believe is right
I do what I believe is good

I fight for justice
I fight for freedom

I am a Hero

in a big way, in a small way
In my own way

I am a Hero

Stand up Now, Be a Hero

-0-

I don't have political inclinations, regardless of yours, I hope you can get pass that and see the true message in this video. I love this project.

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Coffee Table Book @ 30

If you're a Flickr fan, a regular blog hopper, a youtube viewer, or a daily newspaper reader then you've probably already encountered LAGALAG: the Travelling Journal of Filipinos. The project was started by Wilfredo Pascual and involves a moleskin notebook being passed around the world to 20 different Filipinos in different locations in the world. The promotional video in youtube had the following tag lines:

Twenty Filipinos all over the worldwho have never met will share images and stories.

Ten destinations abroad.
Ten Philippine Destinations.

Los Angeles. Chicago. Houston. New York.
Ontario. London. Doha. Yokohama. Islamabad.
Bangkok. Manila. Nueva Ecija. Cebu.

Twenty ways on how Filipinos see the world.

I only heard of this when my sister introduced me to Daphne Oseña's blog and when it made the front pages in a leading newspaper this week. As it turned out, one book was not enough! A second book was circulated around the Philippines. (I wonder if Davao has a representative.) Now, both books are in the hands of Daphne, their final destination. And she's on her way to a 7-day vacation with the purpose of writing her entry in both moleskin diaries.

If only I had known of this earlier, I would have definitely applied for a spot in this historic project. Considering that I have lived abroad for 4 years and have experienced living in all the 3 major island groups of the Philippines (Luzon, Visayas, Mindanao), I think I would have had a great chance of getting picked. It would have made the perfect gift for my 30th as well.

Talking about the big 3-0, turning 30 has always been celebrated as a milestone. (Add another year and you'll be out in almost half of the calendar months hehehe) A cousin who hasn't been celebrating her birthday for a while threw quite an extravagant party for her 30th. A friend celebrated hers for 3 consecutive days, one for each decade as she relates. Another friend is doing 30 things for the first time before he turns 30. First on his list was speed dating. (^O^)/

All these made me realize what to do with mine. I really didn't have anything planned in particular. Although I jokingly said to a friend that I would celebrate mine the whole month of my birth month, one for each year, totalling to 30 days. hehehe (^O^) But let's face it, this is quite impossible, especially now given the fact that I'm on a low budget these days. And then out of the blue, this entry about moleskin diaries crossed my mind. "Why not make my own?!", I thought, "but with a twist!" It just so happens that I bought a scrapbook after my trip to Thailand. It's all covered and ready! I even used a special cloth I bought in Thailand to cover it. All that's waiting is for my pictures and stories! And when i counted the pages, it totalled exactly to 30! (Made me think even more that this was really meant to be - very Filipino of me I guess. hehehe).

I won't be making something similar to LAGALAG, I'm not worthy of that yet. Instead I'll be aiming at making my first coffee table book! I've always dreamt of making one. This will be the perfect time. I have no definite concepts yet as to how the final product should be but it will definitely contain the pictures i've taken and the stories i've written over the years. I'll definitely have it published like a true coffee book table even if I have to avail of a cash advance loan to do so.

Would you be interested in buying a copy?
Limited stocks available. Place your reservations now.
hehehe (^O^)v

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Equality on the Tennis Courts

Men vs. Women

Equality among men and women have long been a standing issue. Over the years, I believe the situation has gone better with women in society getting better treatments. Of course, women are never satisfied. (Which sidetracks me to Roberto Cavalli's flirtatious question for Miss Mexico at the Miss Universe 2008 Pageant, "When is a woman truly satisfied?") (Peace to all women out there! (^o^)v) And it is no different on the tennis courts. Women players, spearheaded by the great Billie Jean King, have been clamoring for equal prize money between the men's and women's tournaments. And a couple years back , they exactly just got that.

While watching ACE, Star Sports' Tennis Magazine Show, last night, a feature on the finer details of equality made me smile. Here's the financial earnings report of reigning Wimbledon Champions Rafael Nadal and Venus Williams compared.

                    Rafael Nadal     Venus Williams
Earnings (Pounds)                 750,000            850,000 (Singles + Doubles)
Minutes on Court                    1114                1029
Earnings/Minute                    ~673                ~826

I guess it's now the men's turn to feel aggrieved! hehehe ^^ Rafael Nadal spent more minutes on the court but earned less compared to Venus Williams! (Side note: It's not bad to be a tennis player no? Spoken with a Rafa-like accent)

I think issues on equality among men and women will never end. The world is, was, and never will be equal. However, even after having said that, I guess what's really important is learning how to treat everyone fairly.

Read more on what Jon Henderson has to say at The Observer.

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Feels like Grade One

I had severe nosebleeds when I was just a kid. Everytime I ate chocolates and corn-based junk foods like Chippy, my nose would definitely bleed before the day ends. This happens everytime without fail. Mama said that this occurred after I had the measles.

So one day, back when I was about in Grade 4, I remember going to the doctor to have my nose checked. The doctor went through with his routine examination. He listened for blockages in my airways, checked my throat, checked my nose, checked my ears, paused, then checked my ears again and again. "What could be so fascinating with my ears?" I thought, and then as if answering my thoughts, he spoke sporting a concerned look on his face, "There's something inside your ear..."

That same day, the doctor sent me to see an EENT, a doctor specializing in the Eyes, Ears, Nose, and Throat. Our mission was to have that something in my ear removed. I was a bit apprehensive to go. It was my first session with an EENT. I was imaging the process to be long and painful. I was scared.

Five minutes into the session with the EENT, after relaying my ear problem, he asked me to sit sideways by a special chair and then he donned something over his head which I reckoned were huge magnifying glasses. He told me to stay still and in just a few seconds I saw him put something on a piece of paper infront of me. Right there, straight on my gaze, was a square piece of white unknown thing about 6mm in width and height covered by a golden orange gooey stuff! (yucks!) I was embarassed as in a few seconds I recognized what that thing was already.

Although I've told a few people, like my mom, as to what the thing was, I never really shared this story with anyone else. I just got recently reminded of it coming from my Boracay trip. During the trip a friend was sharing how when he was still a kid, he noticed his yaya (babysitter) rolling pieces of paper and using them as toothpick. Curious, he did the same with a newspaper and inserted it through his nose! He says he doesn't remember anymore how it was removed from his nose but upon discovering that a piece of rolled paper was stuck in his nose, the yaya got blamed and was told not to kiss him! wahahaha

This really made me laugh, and secrectly, I was reminiscing my own experience. I never really shared what happened to me as I thought it was embarassing. Even back then, I must have been striving for perfection already. I never realized that such things really were just boys being boys or kids being kids, for that matter. And so this memory was long hidden in a huge chest of embarassing moments deep in the recesses of my brain (only unlocked recently with blogging.)

I remember being in Grade one, sitted like an indian on the floor, in the mid section of the classroom, trying to listen to what the teacher was discussing for the day. Somehow I couldn't give her all my attention as my right hand was busy fiddling a small object. I was unknowingly inserting and removing it from my right ear, all along enjoying the sensation it brings. And then in an instant, somewhat annoyed and foretelling the future, the teacher bursted out at me and said "Sige ka! Pagnapasok yan sa tenga mo!" (How do I translate this? hehehe) (It's something like "Careful with that, it might get stuck in your ear." but more with an annoyed tone than concern.)

I was shocked as the teacher reprimanded me. I stopped what I was doing right there and then and focused my attention back at her again. However, even before the teacher bursted out at me, the pencil ERASER was already stuck in my ear!

If I remember the time frame correctly then that eraser was in my ear for around 3 years! Although it didn't have any serious effect on my hearing or speech, I'm guessing that the reason why I can't sing very well is because of this. wahahaha ^^ But I'm sure I can still train my ears and voice ... watch out! hihihi (^O^)v (ramblings of a frustrated singer)

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The Punch Line (A Sequel)

Let me take you 3 years back, when I was still working in Cebu. One day, I finally mustered enough courage to profess my intentions to a friend on Valentine’s Day (bad timing I know ^^). I bought a bouquet of dozen roses and a little something else, went to the office before she did and waited for her. She arrived, can’t remember exactly what time, before 9am. I gave her the flowers and the gift and that was it.

‘Moving On’ is what everyone does or at least try to do when a tragic event happens, just like when relationships end. In the process, we may tell ourselves lies and force ourselves to believe something in order to make the process lighter, easier, and hopefully faster. There’s totally nothing wrong with doing this so long as we keep the lies to ourselves. Broadcasting these to friends, relatives, and the world for that matter is totally a different matter.

I was tempted to say you’re this, and this, and that. Tempted to cross that border where you stop caring and let it all out. But I’m glad I didn’t. It’s because personally I believe that I cannot condition myself to think that way, to think that not caring is okay. One day I might just reach my threshold and stop caring for everything or everyone else for that matter. What would that make me?

So getting back to the punch line? (Can I get a drum roll please ….)

One more drum roll ….

And another ….

Nobody knew about the bouquet of flowers for her except me, E, and probably E’s husband. The flowers were supposed to be a surprise.

It may have all been settled if I asked for the flowers to be delivered early, or if I simply replied something like ‘you’ll get your flowers later in the day.’ And I could have gone to Cebu, to Boracay, then maybe spent another 5000 pesos or so, and pretended to still feel the same way. But one can’t help but pause and think: ‘Is this the person I love?’ and more importantly, ‘Is this the person who loves me?’ and ‘Is this love?’. Maybe so, maybe not, but certainly it isn’t the type of love that I want.

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Chaotic Silence / My Funny Valentines

After 3 hours in MBA school, a late dinner, and then a sip of coffee (Mocha Froccino), we called it a night and headed for home. The streets were damp from the rain and the air was cool. It was the perfect weather for a good night sleep. But it wasn’t time to do so yet, the coming days were full of exciting promises to come and I have yet to do my preparations. At the strike of midnight, I uploaded the pictures to my webpage and then sent the same pictures through MMS hoping they would be seen first thing in the morning. “Ahhh! Finally, everything is set for now, I can go to sleep. The rest I can follow up tomorrow”, I thought before dozing off to sleep.

I woke up around 9:30 ready to face the day! Today’s gonna be something special, much more the days to come with a planned trip to the most famous beach destination in the phils., Boracay. I grabbed my phone and typed the words “Happy Valentine’s Day!” pressed sent and then rose up to get ready for breakfast. “Bip” goes my phone as the screen illuminated to show a new message. “wala kang kwenta (you’re worthless).” “Huh?” body slumping as I sport a puzzling look on my face. I replied with something like ‘what’s with you?’. No decent reply came except more of the puzzling mystery. I hurriedly ate my breakfast and took a bath all the while trying to solve this puzzle. I got ready to leave the house in order to book reservations for a resort which my visiting friends and I will be going to at the end of the month. Before getting ready to drive, I sent another message saying something like let’s continue later when your head has cooled off already.

Drove all the way to the reservation office with a blank expression on my face, noticing only the car directly in front and the turns where I’m supposed to turn. The SMS kept coming and the puzzle started unravelling. “Didn’t you receive my MMS?” and so I checked my phone, MMS messages on the sent folder, everything looked fine, then I remembered the delivery reports! Shit! One look and I knew, everything was on pending status, the files must have been too large. “Oh well”, I thought, “but still not enough reason, considering also the fact that it was only around 10:30 in the morning.”

I booked the reservations and headed back to where my car was parked. Next stop was to report to work. The SMS exchanges continue until on one final beep my phone lights up and another message popped. A name of a girl whom I courted in the past, 3 years past to be exact, flashes through the screen. “What the *@#$!? How did she get involved?”. Something in my head snapped, accompanied by a feeling of worthlessness swept through me. Did I do anything to deserve this?, Have I not done enough for you all this time …?, This isn’t healthy anymore., were some of the questions and thoughts in my mind. After relaying them, all I got was more of the cold and provoking replies like ‘what have you done beh?’ and ‘And so, if it’s not healthy what would you like do to now?’.

I stopped replying right there and then but in my mind I already knew what I wanted to do. It was going to be a very long drive back to the office, one of chaotic silence, where every sound around you is muffled by the thoughts running through your mind.

First stop was to text E, one of my trusted friends who happens to sideline as a florist during special occasions, and inquire on how the flowers were doing. The flowers weren’t set to be delivered until 3pm, “okay”, I replied “cancel them please.”

Next stop was the airlines office where the service was really bad and after a long wait all they could tell me was to call or come back on Monday for an update. Surprisingly, I didn’t mind the long wait, the place was airconditioned, I didn’t have to do anything but sit down and wait, and people were walking pass me minding their own business. My hopes were low on getting my money back as my tickets were one of those promotional fares and it had been rebooked previously.

After all of which, later in the day, I broke the news.

I gave up, yes.

I stopped BELIEVING, I never pretended.

I’m a hopeless romantic but a simple “Happy Heart’s Day” maybe even followed by a smiley “=)” to show a little more endearment would have been enough for me, something that I never got on that day.

I’d had my share of drama and get more than enough of it from the television and cinemas. And so, I goof off and laugh things off when I’m down. It is my way of coping up with things, I hope nobody misunderstands that.

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I am her Mother

At the Oprah Winfrey show for mother’s day, Helen Williams, mother of actress and singer Vanessa Williams, when asked what she thinks about moms and daughters getting along and being best friends, simply replied

“I am her Mother, she has friends …”

I guess a parent’s job is first and foremost to be a parent to one’s child. Although establishing a rapport and getting on their good side is also good, being honest to them and enforcing what you think is best for them simply comes first.

I can only hope to be able to strike that balance when my time comes.

-0-

Happy Mother’s Day to all moms reading my blog!

-0-

On another note, “Ang Tanging Ina”, a Filipino film about a single mom (Ai-Ai de las Alas) and her twelve children, often gets shown on local or cable TV, during this day in the Philippines. The movie is simply hilarious but quite a tear-jerker as well with Ai-Ai borrowing famous lines and dialogues from other well-known drama movies in the Philippines. This may have been intentionally done for humor but I believe these are actually reminiscent of a typical Filipino family. All these melodramatic scenes we see on TV and in the movies are actually affecting our lives and influencing how we react in more ways than one. I swear one scene from the movie was spot on to an experience I just had a few weeks back.

Remember how our parents reprimand us from watching too much TV? Now that were older, can we advise them of the same? ^^ TV and the movies are really entertaining but for our sakes, we should really limit this and find other forms of entertainment.

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the ONE

It’s December! How are your holiday preparations guys?

Wishing all of you the happiest holiday season ever!

a lone shining red light

Remember those mystery games where in one is given an ending situation and then one has to guess what happened just by asking questions answerable by YES or NO? Try and guess the story behind the lone shining red light in the picture above! Below are some possible answers to your questions. (The story behind it can be found in the comments section) (^O^)/

Clues:

• No, I didn’t run out of colorless lights.


• No, this wasn’t done on purpose (decorating style).


• Yes, I have another series of lights in red with one colorless bulb.


• No, this light doesn’t flash.


• Yes, the other series of lights in red with one colorless bulb does flash.


• No, the colorless lights were just bought recently.


• Yes, the red lights are old.


• Yes, I wanted the red lights to flash.


• And Yes, I wanted the colorless lights not to flash.

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getting ready

In a weeks time I’ll be going back to school! After 7 years, I wonder how school would be like. A bit excited but also apprehensive of the additional load it will take. Classes are only held at night so I don’t have an excuse to ditch work. (^.-)v

Not until recently, I didn’t realize I would need a notebook. “How hard could it get?”, I thought. In college or high school, a notebook may make or break you. But now, I’m attending graduate school, it shouldn’t matter, or so I thought. Going to the local bookstore after classes had already started for all other levels wasn’t such a good idea. As it turned out, most notebooks were already sold out. The only good ones left were Batman or floral themed ones. What was I to do? Do people in graduate school carry Batman notebooks? ….

It took me the whole afternoon to decide!

And I ended up with these …

Finally, some use for some of the junk I took home with me from Japan ^^ wehihihi ^^

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Mama's Quotable Quotes: Liposuction

July 26, 2007

At our store, after lunch hours …

Mama, running out of topics for chit-chat, intensely stares at my face.

“Pen!” she endearingly calls for my attention.

“Why don’t you get a liposuction? …”

A bubble appears above my head with the word: “HUH?”

She gestures, touching the skin below her eyes near the bridge.

“… for your NOSE. ‘Coz it looks fat!”

WEHIHIHIHIHI!!!!

Wanna judge for yourself? Click here.

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